Intellectual Reading

On a recent visit to Mother's, she gave me stacks of magazines. I read several of them today, and I've listed a few things I feel you should know.

Meredith Vieira, of The Today Show, is ready to quit her day job. She and Matt Lauer have never gotten along, and, like me, she hates getting up early in the morning.

Angelina Jolie is pregnant with twins. She was afraid Brad Pitt would leave her if she didn’t give him another biological child.

Valerie Bertinelli is very upset with ex-husband Eddie Van Halen. He's back on the booze. But Valerie is a spokeswoman for Jenny Craig now, and she's too busy starving herself to convince him to return to rehab.

Kirstie Alley, former spokeswoman for Jenny Craig, is not starving herself; she now weighs almost 250 pounds. She was recently fired. Unfairly, she says, calling Bertinelli a "skinny bitch."

It must be going around; Barbra Streisand has gained 40 pounds. Friends say she has become very moody and frustrated. There is a bright side, though; husband James Brolin is constantly reassuring her that she's beautiful. (He'll keep it up if he knows what's good for him!)

Author Joe Nick Patoski has written a biography about Willie Nelson—Willie Nelson: An Epic Life—which will come out in April. The excerpts are interesting. His first wife tied poor Willie up and beat him with a broom when he came home late after a night of partying, and his second wife cornered him with a gun and threatened to blow him away because he was seeing another woman.

Now we know why Willie penned Always on my Mind!

Lisa Marie Presley is pregnant by her fourth husband, Michael Lockwood. She says a child with Michael will make her life complete. Priscilla Presley is very excited about the prospect of another grandchild. But she's upset about her last facelift. The plastic surgeon botched it, and her face is now stiff as a board.

Remember Gary Coleman of Different Strokes? His new wife accused him of trying to run her over with his pick-up. According to the police report, the little fellow was in a rage, pounding the steering wheel of his truck, throwing his arms wildly in the air, and screaming nonstop.

Now, I'm going on to more intellectual reading, such as The New Yorker and Vanity Fair. But I doubt they will be as interesting as The National Enquirer!